


A Thousand Skies

by iheartmonkeys19



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Airplanes, Angst with a Happy Ending, Captain Jung Jaehyun, Fluff, JaeYong - Freeform, M/M, Pilot!AU, a bit of johnten, a lot of pining, taeyong is a flight attendant, try again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-16
Updated: 2018-04-21
Packaged: 2019-03-05 16:32:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13391805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iheartmonkeys19/pseuds/iheartmonkeys19
Summary: Seemingly perfect Captain Jung Jaehyun seems to enjoy turning every airport into his own personal runway.Newly promoted chief flight attendant Lee Taeyong just wants to get through another trip without a hitch.It's been years since they broke up but in between transits and layovers, they find themselves thinking of each other and realise - that there's too much baggage to keep avoiding one another.





	1. Layovers

“Have you seen my tie?” Taeyong asked frantically digging through a box of Lego’s in his sister's house. He was just about to leave the house for work and of course, it was during these crucial moments when he misplaced his tie or his name tag or his good pair of black socks like always.

He was rushing. _Again._

“I think it was on the sofa. You let your niece play with it.” His sister said, wiping her wet hands on her apron.

“Thanks for letting me stay for a few days.” He kissed her cheek and fumbled with his tie at the same time but his sister took it from him, smoothing it into his suit jacket.

“It’s okay. It was nice having you visit. But I swear to god Taeyong when are you going to start actually seeing people? Like actual dating!” His sister groaned.

"You know I'm married to my job. Besides they just promoted me to a chief flight attendant."

“Taeyong you need to get out more honey.” She tutted.

“You should really stop trying to set me up on blind dates. They never end well.” Taeyong shook his head then shivered at the last blind date he was forced into.

"I wouldn't have to if you just set up a Tinder profile."

"He was married!” Taeyong exclaimed, exasperated at his single status is constantly the subject of scrutiny in the family.

"Wow, you're really gonna hold that against me forever aren't you?"

"With three kids noona!"

"Okay, okay... I promise I won't meddle with your love life anymore. But you have to promise me you'll at least try to get out more. I don't like seeing you so..." Her face softened and she straightened his tie. " So lonely. You're not hung up on him still right?" Taeyong knew who she was referring too but he doesn’t want to say the name out loud.

"It's been years." He dismissed her.

"Time doesn't really mean a thing when it comes to love." She patted his cheek and accompanied him to the door.

"You're being too cringey too early in the morning."

"Call me when you get to LA.”

"I will. Thanks, noona!" He said before tugging his suitcase and ducking into his awaiting uber.

 

He was in a good mood that day, just off a long weekend break and ready to take on the world. Lee Taeyong took pride in his level-headed meticulousness; it's his great attention to detail and attentiveness to his surroundings that allowed him to flourish the way he did as a flight attendant. It's just the way he always is- sensitive and polite and eager to please. That's why management finally noticed his efforts and his hard work, enough to promote him to be a chief flight attendant, and he was over the moon with happiness.

  
He was beaming on the way to the offices, ready to check the details of his leg on the system. He quickly found an unoccupied computer and found his flight details, printing out a few lists he would need. But then he read the names of the pilots and he froze.

Second officer: Nakamoto Yuta.  
First officer: Johnny Seo.  
Captain (PIC): Jung Jaehyun.

Taeyongs mind went blank for a good 5 seconds.

_Jung Jaehyun._

He shivered, then shook his head.  
_No. He was professional and on top of his game. He wouldn’t let anything cloud his judgement. Not even his ex. Not even Jung fucking perfect Jaehyun._

  
He remembered only fractions of their brief relationship, the rest was a blur of dark and light moments like there were always too many shadows or too many spotlights.  
He remembered the first moment he saw Jaehyun in his uniform, fresh-faced, just out of flight school and those goddamn dimples and crescent-like eyes that appeared when he smiled and Taeyong just melted. He just melted into that boy.

And he remembered being flustered and shy when Jaehyun first approached him in the staff room, with his hands rubbing his nape shyly and a light pink dusting his cheeks, brazenly asking if he was busy that Friday night. He remembered forgetting his phone number when Jaehyun asked for it.

  
He remembered their first date too when Jaehyun’s flight was delayed and Taeyong had a lunch break and so they spent that small gap just talking at a small corner in a cafe in the terminal, drinking lattes and he remembered Jaehyun drawing his likeness on his napkin and making him laugh with his stupid dad jokes.  
He remembered the first time they spent the night together at Jaehyun’s apartment. It was abrupt and unplanned and Taeyong has never been so swept up so passionately like that. Every touch seemed to ignite some kind of untapped fire in his bones and he felt so so loved to be in those arms, to feel those lips on his, to hear someone else call his name so softly like that. And they ended up opening a tub of Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough whilst watching Game of Thrones that night, legs intertwined, poking each other with their cold spoons.

He remembered their first fight too.

_But not really._

 

He doesn’t recall what it was about but the tension has been brewing there for a while. Too many missed calls and missed dates and less time just talking to each other.  
One day he’d be in Dubai managing systems there when Jaehyun was in Germany and the next he’d be back in Seoul when the other was in Jakarta. It was just too many miles apart, too many time zones apart and it certainly felt like a thousand skies apart too. Their romance had been plagued with jet lag and envy and it was just... impossible to have any more moments of intimacy, of them.

And one day after an exhausting day at work Taeyong was about to finish writing his reports on a malfunction with one of the checking logs when he saw Jaehyun and a pretty flight attendant laughing together, sharing a cup of coffee that should have been his.

 

_Too clingy. Too close. Too friendly._

_"Please, have you seen the way half the stewardesses flirt with you?"_

_"As if they don't flirt with you Captain Jung Jaehyun."_

_"Stop that you know I would never go that far with any of the stewardesses."_

 

And Taeyong tried really hard not to be. But he was tired and this was going nowhere.

_Nine months._

  
They had lasted for nine months before it became clear that it wasn’t going to work out. And as much as Taeyong would like to admit he tried, he can’t really say they were prepared for that kind of commitment, that kind of relationship. He was a jealous person, and Jaehyun was a very sociable handsome man who held hearts in vain.  
He doesn’t remember who told who first. But he remembers the flash of hurt that passed through Jaehyun’s eyes. And he remembered them fighting again. He remembered crying that night when Jaehyun left him even though he saw it happening a long time ago.

He remembered not functioning for a month and just drowning in his work until his flight attendant friend, Ten, asked if he wanted to switch to the flight crew. Three years later of successfully working hard and avoiding his ex, he narrowly managed to avoid him altogether at the airport and offices and since he was just a normal flight attendant before, there really was no need to interact with pilots directly. But he’s finally here; chief flight attendant and his first day with none other than pilot-in-charge Jung Jaehyun.  
He knew he would have to face him sooner or later.

It's been five minutes since they had made eye contact and Taeyong can't meet his eyes again. Doesn't dare to. They were on the shuttle on the way to the plane and having a brief about the flight.

There is a strange tension no one wants to mention and it was no secret why. Johnny and Yuta and most of the crew were mutual friends of both the captain and the head flight attendant. They all knew how that ended.

Taeyong tried not to stare too much. Though admittedly, the charm and appeal of the uniform never really faded away. The suit and the hat and his epaulettes that had proud, golden stripes never really ran out of style. Or maybe because Jaehyun was just ridiculously handsome. Probably both.  
“As you know I’m your captain Jaehyun and the first and second officers on this flight today will be Johnny and Yuta here to LAX. I hope we have a good run and a great flight together. If you’re in need of any assistance don’t hesitate to call on me or the rest of the crew.”  
Jaehyun glanced at Taeyong who was busy reading and rechecking the list of crew members, making sure all their medicals and passports were fine. He still looked so beautiful and pure. So oblivious to everyone’s stares and constant praise.

“Everything seems okay.” He told Yuta who nodded and smiled.

“You’re doing a good job Taeyong-ah. Relax a bit.”

“Thanks.” A stab of jealousy blossomed in Jaehyun’s heart. He used to be the source of Taeyong’s smile, the cause of his laughter, the reason his eyes would crinkle in delight every time he said something witty.

 

But it’s different now.

He wonders if Taeyong thinks of him at least a bit, at random points in the day when he sees a napkin, or when he watched TV and a show they used to watch together would come on, or every time he eats ice cream. He wondered if he ever makes an appearance in his dreams and plagued his nights.

He wondered if there was spite there if he did.

He wondered if there was still love there.

He wondered if at moments like these where they were forced to work with each other if he is attacked by tidal waves of memories.

Because it feels that way for Jaehyun.

 

Later on, the plane when the trio of pilots was checking the control panels, Taeyong peeked through with a polite smile on his face. Jaehyun knew that smile. It was his professional game face on, of reserved over-civility, it was for the passengers, for the crew, for him now.

“Hey, guys. What would you like to have in your holders?”

“Just plain water for me and Jae. Yuta?” Johnny answered.

“Diet Coke please.” Yuta chimed in.

“For lunch, we have sea bass or roasted lamb with rosemary.”

“The sea bass sounds good. What do you want Jae?”

“I think I’ll have the lamb.”

“Of course. You were always a meat person.” Taeyong said unwittingly.

“What?”

“Nothing.” He blushed, dropping his head slightly at his slip.

“Yuta?”

“I think I’ll have the lamb too. Thank’s Taeyong.”

“Do you guys want your lunch earlier or later?”

“I don’t know about you all, but I’m starving,” Johnny said.

“Me too actually.”

“Then we’ll have our lunches earlier Taeyong-ssi.” Jaehyun clarified. It felt weird. Saying his name without the hyung fixed at the back or Taeyongie or his rap alter ego TY Track or simply Yong. It felt too wrong.

“Y-yes okay I’ll be back with your drinks.” He stuttered, going back to the first class galley.

"I'm going to check the engine and wheels." Jaehyun sighed, taking out a fluorescent jacket and a pair of noise-cancelling headphones and heading down onto the tar.

 

“Taeyong just got promoted as chief flight attendant didn’t he?” Johnny asked Yuta now that Jaehyun was gone.

“Yes.”

“Fate has a way of being very ironic doesn't it ?”

“Very.” Yuta grinned, then shook his head.

"You think they'll ever... ya know..."

"I'm not a psychic Johnny."

"Of course it's just... they were good together. It's a shame." Johnny shrugged but he always felt saddened by his friends being unable to reconcile.

"True. I mean Jesus when they're in a room together it just reeks of unresolved sexual frustration." Yuta groaned and Johnny laughed loudly, unable to hold back a smile.

 

Just as the seatbelt light came on and the chime went off Taeyong was already on his feet preparing some snacks for the pilots as Ten and Kun both started preparing the lunches for the first class galley.  
  
He cautiously entered the cockpit with a basket of snacks and drinks.

“Sorry, I’m late.”

“It’s okay Taeyong.” Johnny smiled good-naturedly. He passed them their drinks and was about to unpack some more snacks when Jaehyun cut him off.

"Why is Johnny's water cold and mine isn't?" He didn’t think his words would come out as harshly but they do and he knows it’s because he felt that maybe Taeyong was playing favourites and he had an ego to uphold and Taeyong made him tense. The poor flight attendant quickly becomes flustered, trying to find words to explain.

"S-sorry... I uh... well I heard you coughing just now s-so- you know what let me get you another bottle.” Taeyong reached out for the bottle in Jaehyun’s grip but Jaehyun pulled it away. Becoming even more flustered, Taeyong glances up to meet his eyes, half annoyed and half embarrassed.

  
But Jaehyun is blushing too. He is too pale to hide the flush on his face and his neck. And he is too transparent to hide his surprise.

"Oh... it's okay. I’m sorry. Thank you for... for noticing." He nodded dumbly, putting the bottle into his holder.  
Johnny and Yuta share a knowing look of glee but their lips remained restrained and pursed.

"Wouldn't want the captain to get sick after all." Taeyong reasoned, brushing his jacket needlessly.

_I wouldn't want you to get sick you dumbass._

"Of course. Thank you Taeyong.”

“I’ll serve you lunch in half an hour. But here’s some bread rolls and nuts to nibble on if you’re peckish.” He takes out a large plastic bag full of bread rolls and biscuits and aeroplane nuts which Yuta smugly reaches for like a child.

“Bless your soul Lee Taeyong.”

 

An hour later, Taeyong does serve them lunch, he silently passed a packet of cough drops to Jaehyun who whispered thanks. Jaehyun doesn’t really know what else to say.

 

Three hours into the flight Johnny whined that he wanted to go to the toilet and Yuta called for Taeyong. As was standard procedure, the flight attendant had to be in the cockpit when one of the pilots went to the lavatory. Yuta took over Johnny’s seat and Taeyong entered, looking more tired than before.. the bags underneath his eyes becoming more obvious.

“Taeyong-ah,” Yuta called out, a gleeful smile gracing his lips.

“Hmm?”

“You look tired.”

“That’s what happens when you have to push a thirty-pound service cart up and down a plane Nakamoto Yuta.”

“Sarcasm suits you well.” Yuta grinned and patted the seat behind him. “You can rest if you want. Just sit and close your eyes for a minute.”

“It’s okay, my break is in an hour.” Taeyong shook his head and sat on the seat.

“Hey whatever happened to that date you told me about? Some business dude.” Yuta suddenly said, making Taeyong panic. Jaehyun cleared his throat, uncomfortable already and it's only been one minute with Taeyong in the cockpit.

“It w-went fine.” He detected the lie in the elder's voice but it still irked him nonetheless. He knew when Taeyong lied. A decade, no, a century could've passed but he knew. The idea of Taeyong dating someone else.

“Ah, so you’re dating now?”

“No. It just ... didn’t click. I don’t think I have time to date anyway.”

“Say, Jae, when’s the last time you went on a date hm? You too should get out more. You’re so obsessed with your jobs.”

“I wonder what’s taking Johnny so long?” Taeyong said out loud.

“Probably flirting with Ten,” Jaehyun replied tersely. He knew his co-pilots were in cahoots. And though he was somewhat touched that they would care enough to butt into his love life recklessly, like newborn hurricanes in the sea, he was still annoyed to be put in such a position. He was the pilot-in-charge for fucks sakes, He didn't need a set up like this. He promptly pressed the call button to the first class, a little to harshly, it ringed twice before Kun picked it up.  


 

"Tell Johnny and Ten to break it up."

"How do you even know they're talking to each other?" Kun asked, surprised, but Jaehyun merely rolled his eyes. Oh, he knew.

"Instinct." Jaehyun almost growled over the intercom.

 

Yuta and Taeyong remained silent. Taeyong had his eyes trained on the vastness of the sky. Jaehyun knew how much Taeyong liked the skies, especially from the cockpit, how seamless and big it looked. How open, how warm. he told him that one day when they sat on Jaehyun's couch. It is a vague memory, but he remembered skimming Taeyong's cheek with fingertips whilst he read the same page of some Dan Brown novel. And Taeyong had his head on his lap, murmuring something about data encryption being a 'bloody labyrinth this time'. He remembered tossing his book and pulling Taeyong into his lap, the other squealing startled, and he remembered kissing him silly till he was whining and gasping and pouting.

Jaehyun realised he was staring off into the same distant sky as the door of the cockpit slid open and Johnny slipped in, making way for Taeyong to slip out of the cockpit silently. He thought it was ironic that they were starring at the same sky just a minute ago; when it felt like they were a thousand skies apart.  
The cockpit door slipped open and Johnny entered, making way for Taeyong to quickly slip out silently too. If he noticed the strange atmosphere, he is clever enough not to ask aloud.

“You did that on purpose.” Jaehyun tried to keep his voice calm, but it breaks slightly and he cannot mask his feelings of being betrayed.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Yuta replied calmly.

Jaehyun may be flying an aeroplane, but he felt strangely vulnerable in that moment.


	2. Makeovers

Jaehyun emerged from the toilet somewhat groggy and a little bit emo because of the stunt Yuta and Johnny had pulled. After half an hour of stifling silence in the cockpit, he was ready to take his break and take a well-deserved nap. He stumbled upon Ten in the first class galley, heating up cookies, probably for those kids in business class who were still watching movies whilst the adults all slept around them.

"Where's Taeyong? Isn't it still his shift?"  
"He had to deal with a drunk passenger, it got pretty physical and tense at one point so I told him to rest up first before we deal with serving dinner." He stiffened unconsciously at the news.  
"Is he okay?”  
"He's fine. Slightly bruised. It's not the first time we've dealt with rowdy passengers."  
"Slightly bruised? You should've told me." He whisper-shouted, eyebrows knitting tensely.  
"What could you do Jaehyun? Stop the plane? Besides, most pilots wouldn't care." Ten replied with a calm face but he was obviously pissed off as well.  
"I'm not like most-"  
"You're not like most pilots?" He interjected, eyes raised in defiance, cutting him off coldly.  
"Not... not anymore."  
“He’s fine. He’s resting.” Ten assured him. Though it doesn’t really assure him.  
“Right... okay.”

Jaehyun doesn’t see Taeyong for the rest of the duration of the flight.  
He couldn’t help but worry.

“Ladies and gentlemen welcome to LAX airport, Los Angeles California. The time is 7.46 pm and the temperature is 21 Celcius. For your safety and comfort, please remain seated with your seatbelt fastened until the Captain turns off the Fasten Seat Belt sign. This will indicate that we have parked at the gate and that it is safe for you to move about. On behalf of Korean Airlines and the entire crew, I’d like to thank you for joining us on this trip and we are looking forward to seeing you on board again in the near future. Have a nice evening." Taeyong's melodic voice announced and Jaehyun sighed in his seat.  
What a long flight.  
When they landed Johnny glanced at his watch with a grin. Jaehyun knew that grin well.

“It’s still early.”  
“Say you up for some burgers? It’s almost tradition at this point.” Yuta yawned not-so-subtlety.  
“In-N-Out?”  
“Where else?”  
“Ask Tae and Kun to join.”  
“Ten too.” Johnny chimes in.  
“Hmm... let’s check in first though.”

They did end up at In-N-Out after they changed into more casual attire. Jaehyun pretends not to catch the wide grin on Johnny’s face when Ten walks in with Kun and a few other flight attendants except Taeyong. No Taeyong.  
Where the fuck is Taeyong?  
Now Jaehyun wasn’t desperate he just... he just wanted to see if the other was okay.

And perhaps that’s how he ended up in front of Taeyong’s hotel room with a plastic bag Ten had happily relinquished before getting dragged into Johnny’s hotel room.

He knocked. The door opened. And he stopped breathing.  
“Hi.” Jaehyun started, then he realised he doesn't really know what to say.  
“Hi.” Taeyong was groggy but still quite taken aback by the sudden appearance of Jung Jaehyun of all people.  
He really didn't think this through because he stands there for a good minute just thinking of what to say because Taeyong is in pyjama set with kittens on them that Jaehyun gave him as a joke one fine day and it's too big for his frail body. His collarbones are exposed, sharp, prominent, he doesn't remember them being so visible, he used to trace letters right there with his fingertips. And there is an onslaught of feelings that come with seeing him like this. So familiar but not his.  
So inexplicably Taeyong.  
“Can I help you with something Jaehyun?”

“Umm... Ten told me what happened on the flight and he said you were too tired to go out for dinner so I thought I’d just give you this. In-N-Out Cheeseburger. No pickles. Like you like. And I got you aspirin just in case."  
“You didn’t have to do all that..."  
“I was worried.” He admitted, flushing red at the tips of his ears. He was never really good at the whole lying thing when everything could be read so clearly on his face.  
“You don’t have to worry about me either. I’m fine.”  
“Am I not allowed to worry?” There is an edge of desperation in his voice, he knows. Taeyong is taken aback again and he struggled to find the words.  
“I... I don’t know.” He admits, flushes, and Jaehyun visibly deflated. Taeyong doesn't really understand the situation fully.  
“Well get some rest then. Goodnight.” He nodded, handing over the plastic bag, careful not to touch Taeyong.

“Hey Jae?”  
“Hmm?”  
“I really appreciate this. Thanks.” Taeyong gives him a small smile, unable to fully express how he felt. But he hoped the other would get the message.  
“You’re welcome.”

Taeyong walked into the breakfast buffet with his hair still sleep-tousled in a white hoodie and jeans. He’s still pretty tired and drained out from the long haul flight, but the sleep has definitely helped.  
He piles his plate high with pancakes drizzled with syrup and sausages, as much as his flight attendant diet would allow and fills up his tall glass with orange juice. It’s not long before he sees Ten waving at him, asking him to join him, Johnny and Jaehyun at their table.  
It’s awkward after last night. And Taeyong doesn’t know what to say but he doesn’t protest when Ten drags him to the table.

“Slept well?”  
“Yeah.”  
“You’re not still sick are you?”  
“No... just a bit tired.”

“Our flight back is delayed until tomorrow. Some technical problem with the navigating system. We fly tomorrow at midday.” Johnny said, mouth full, frowning at his phone.  
“So we have another night?”  
“Yes.” He confirmed.  
“You know what this means!” Ten almost leapt out of his seat.  
“We are not going clubbing.” Jaehyun and Taeyong simultaneously say. They stare at each other for a second before snapping out of it when Ten whistled.  
“Of course we are.” Yuta grinned, unmoved.  
“I don’t want inebriated pilots flying an Airbus.” Jaehyun wiped his mouth with the napkin.  
“Or inebriated flight attendants,” Johnny added, winking at Ten.

  
“That too.”  
“Lighten up Jae.”  
“You’ll go right Taeyong?” Ten whined.  
“Ummm well...” He doesn’t get to answer.  
“It’s settled.”  
“I... well Ten.”  
“Oh come on Taeeee. You promised me last time and you bailed.” Ten pouts some more.  
“Fine, it’s not like I have anything better to do.”  
“Or anyone better to do.” Ten yelped when Taeyong pinched his side. He doesn’t catch the glare Jaehyun sends Ten.  
“Shut up you twink.”  
“You’re a twink too.” Yuta reminds him and the table burst into laughter when Taeyong blushes pink and tries to vehemently deny.  
He doesn’t catch the way Jaehyun stares at him amongst the rowdiness.

 

* * *

 

The club lights are too bright and the music blares too much for Taeyong’s ears. To some extent... he gets it. Why people would wanna get drunk on multicoloured cocktails and dance the night away to trashy EDM music. Heck, his 19-year-old self would love this. But he’s not 19 anymore and it makes him sigh at the garish display.  
“I’m too old for this.”  
“You’re never too old to get wasted.” Ten groaned and hit his shoulder as they walked over to the bar. He has glitter in his hair and rimmed over his eyes was wearing a metallic, silver sequinned-esque getup that will no doubt reflect every single fucking strobe light. He literally was the disco ball and it was so him that Taeyong had to admit he was jealous of such confidence.  
“Who even packs glitter eyeliner?”  
“I do, shut up.”

He literally sashays into Johnny’s arms at the bar and Taeyong is kinda left dumbstruck there staring at Jaehyun in his leather jacket, skintight jeans, hair tousled. James Dean would cry, he concludes. Ten and Johnny move to the dance floor but he joins Jaehyun at the bar, ordering a Daiquiri and instantly regretting and grimacing at the tartness.  
“You still suck at alcohol.” Jaehyun chuckles softly next to him. Taeyong was intentionally ignoring him but he can’t anymore when Jaehyun nudges him on the shoulder.  
“You and I both know we’re not the club type.”  
“Yeah... why did we get dragged into this...”  
“Because Johnny and Ten can’t accept no for an answer.”  
“True...”  
“And someone needs to drag Yuta’s drunk ass back to the hotel whilst they fuck.” Jaehyun smiles against his glass before finishing his martini.  
“That is also... true.” Taeyong smiles back.

  
“Actually, there’s been something I’ve been wanting to do since we landed in LA. If you would care to join me?”  
“Where?” Taeyong asks, unguarded. He doesn’t usually entertain Jaehyun’s ideas but he can’t help it when it’s so easy to slip back into... into this. Whatever this was.  
So when Jaehyun gets off his stool, Taeyong does too and he follows him out, the cool Californian night inviting, Jaehyun's hand around his, enveloping, something fuzzier than alcohol buzzing his insides.

  
And that’s how they ended up at an Italian style ice cream parlour at sobering 10.36pm a few blocks away by the boulevard.  
“Ice cream seriously?”  
“Do you want vanilla? You liked vanilla.”  
“I liked.”  
“Uhuh... well Mr-I-don’t-like-vanilla-anymore, what do you want? My treat.” Jaehyun is concentrated on the large vats of ice cream over the counter. Taeyong scans the names as well next to him.  
“Vodka and chocolate.”  
“You can barely handle a glass of wine you lightweight. One scoop of vanilla please and one... um... cookie dough.” He requests.  
“You’re such an ass.” Taeyong groaned.  
“Wouldn’t you loveee to tap this ass.” Jaehyun smiles, uninhibited.  
“I have.” He deadpanned.  
There is a moment of silence and then Jaehyun’s face splits into a smile.  
“Oh shit that came out wrong.” He laughs and it sounds a little tipsy, a little warmer. Taeyong laughs too.  
They eat their ice cream and it’s stupid because Taeyong’s keeps melting and sliding down his fingers and he licks it off quickly before it gets worse but it does. And his right hand is sticky now as the vanilla dribbles down.

“It’s gotta be the heat.”  
“You’re just so bad at eating ice cream too.” Jaehyun teased him.  
“It’s the heat.” He glares back but Jaehyun reaches out to his wrist and shamelessly licks the ice cream off his hand.

Taeyong swatted him away with a scowl despite the flush of pink and Jaehyun nodded knowingly.  
“You’re right definitely the heat.”

They talk some more until the shop closes at 11 pm and Taeyong suggests something random because ... well because he hasn’t been with Jaehyun like this in so long and it feels so surreal.  
“There’s a bar next door though.”  
“You want to get drunk before a flight?”  
“There’s like 14 hours till the flight. That gives us like 2 hours to have a beer and catch up.”  
“You suck at alcohol.”  
“And you suck in general so let’s get a pint.”

There’s not a lot of people. Perhaps a couple in a booth in the corner and a few other people playing pool but there’s not a crowd and Taeyong swears there’s something like what Lana Del Rey’s younger sister would sound like playing sotto voce in the background.  
Taeyong talked excitedly about his niece, his newfound happiness as a steward, his current obsession with soap making. Jaehyun listened attentively, amused and not surprised someone like Taeyong would make soap. He admitted to Taeyong his days are long stretches of monotonous routine when he’s off work. There’s not much to do other than work out and read crime thrillers and the occasional Netflix series. They totally skip over the question of dating because Taeyong knows Jaehyun is single and Jaehyun doesn’t want to know at all.  
Taeyong giggly and it’s endearing but Jaehyun knows that’s the alcohol talking.  
“Are you gonna cry? What if you start crying? Ten would butcher me. Damn it hyung you’re such a sad drunk.” Jaehyun laughed.  
“I am not a sad drunk!”  
“Remember the time you started hugging trees and crying over capitalism because Yuta had told you about how they killed minks to make fur coats and you googled them and then you started crying cause they were so little and cute.”  
“That’s not fair! You have too high of an alcohol tolerance for me to recount any stupid drunk shit you did!” Taeyong whined and hit his bicep.

“I’ve missed you.” Jaehyun suddenly said, tips ears red. “Sometimes I just want to reach out and kiss you again.” He added wistfully, those eyes seeking his. “But I’m not allowed to.”  
“This doesn’t count because you’re drunk.”  
“I’m not drunk. I have a high tolerance. Remember Taeyongie?”  
“Liar. This doesn’t count.” He scowled.  
“Pffftt of course it does. You know me. I’m always honest. When am I not?”  
“When we were dating.” Taeyong countered back, not intending to be malicious in his drunken stupor but the hurt look Jaehyun gives him sobers him up.“Look I-”  
“I never lied to you. You know that. Why- let's not do this here.” Jaehyun sighed.  
“I’m sorry. That’s uncalled for. I shouldn’t have brought back the past. Maybe we should leave now.”  
It’s in the dimmed bar, with quiet Jazz playing in the background when Jaehyun presses his lips against Taeyong’s. It’s just a chaste one, soft, quick nothing deep but Taeyong’s left breathless. He moved forward himself, hands wrapping around Jaehyun’s nape, lips meeting in a fevered kiss and they remembered the taste of each other. How easy it was.  
“Did you miss this? Please tell me that you did. That I wasn’t imagining things.” He knows what he sounds like, desperate, regretful and a tad demanding.  
“Of course I did.” Taeyong gasped for air, nose pressed against Jaehyun’s cheek. “For the past three years, I’ve been... doing just that.”  
“God me too.” Jaehyun sighed into another kiss, he’s eager and enthusiastic and he’s missed this so much because his hands move to Taeyong’s waist. But Taeyong strained himself away from him, pushing him away lightly, biting his wet lips and Jaehyun almost busts a nut.  
“N-not here ...”

 

They literally stumble into Taeyong’s room, like drunken teenagers and it certainly feels like it. Like a stupid one night stand but at the back of Jaehyun’s head, he can’t help but only think of the Taeyong he knew. His laugh, his smile everything they ever shared three years ago every flame and every moment and he feels a lot older, he really does but it’s Taeyong’s stupid smile that makes him want it like the first time.

  
Taeyong can only think of how selfish he wants to be. Beneath his fingers were everything. Jaehyun’s skin, his bones, his flesh, the scent that filled his nostrils with that of fresh linen and moringas and honeysuckles in the morning. It was so much of him, so much of them. He is here underneath Taeyong's fingertips, and he tugged impatiently at the hairs above his nape, earning a growl from the younger.

  
It’s a riot of butterflies in the depths of his stomach, he thought they were dead, but apparently not because they’re reincarnated into an intense fluttering that leaves him wondering if he could ever look at Jaehyun ever again.

  
It’s so easy and familiar and Jaehyun presses his hands against Taeyongs hips, hard and greedy, probably leaving bruises as he hoists Taeyong against him. His lips are pressed against him too, whispering pretty words against the skin above his heart. He’s working on his belt and Taeyong shudders when he gets through, pushing his pants and boxers down in a rush.

  
“Hyung you feel so good in my hand. Did you miss this?”  
Taeyong really wants to answer yes but he can’t trust himself not to sound so needy when Jaehyun is nipping at the skin on the clavicle and pumping his cock with one hand.  
“Answer me. Did you miss this baby? Being so eager for me? So pretty for me.” He suddenly becomes so commanding and Taeyong’s forgotten this side of Jaehyun’s that’s almost crippling and possessive in the bedroom.  
“Y-yes.” Taeyong stuttered, hips bucking to meet Jaehyun’s fist.  
“If only you could see yourself hyung. How pretty you are like this.” He falls to his knees at the end of the bed and some part of Taeyong dies a little when Jaehyun takes him into his mouth. It’s such a wet heat that has him floored. He might be all high and mighty but Jaehyun always took care of him first, it was always a give and take in their relationship and it made Taeyong’s heart clench almost painfully. Because everyone else had wanted him begging on his knees too but never wanted him after. Never wanted him other than to satisfy their own needs.  
“J-Jaehyunnie.” He shuddered, his abdomen tightening. Jaehyun sucks him harder, holds him closer, tongue against his slit. Tasting him, savouring him like this was the last time he’d suck cock.  
“N-No stop. I d-don’t want to-to... not like this.” Taeyong’s hands push against his cheek, mewling and panting. He lets Taeyong go with a lewd pop and other quickly pulls him into a heated kiss, leading him back to the bed.  
“I know.”

Taeyong groaned as Jaehyun kissed his neck tracing long-forgotten pathways down to his collarbones where he nipped lightly on the skin. It’s been too long and Jaehyun is too overwhelming. His body responded so well against the younger, so attuned after all these years.  
“Other people couldn’t compare, right? All those shitty tinder dates. And hookups... it’s always been me, right? Who could give it to you like this?”  
Taeyong can’t speak.  
Of course, it’s always Jaehyun.  
Of course, no one could compare. Could ever compare.  
“God I missed you so much.” He threw his head back against the pillow, drowning in the ecstasy. How could he burn so much in one moment? How could he love someone else as fiercely as he much as he loved Jaehyun?  
“Look at me. Only I could do this Taeyong.” Jaehyun gripped his chin, forcing him to look him right in the eyes.  
“Jaehyunnie... yes.”  
“Only me.”  
“Only you.”  
“Mine.” He growled as he thrust with abandon.  
In the midst of it all, Jaehyun leaned down and pressed a light kiss to the bridge of his nose.

It’s just a small gesture. Miniscule. But he felt his heart squeeze painfully at that. Because this is Jaehyun. Not anyone else. Not some one night stand. This was Jaehyun and Jaehyun cares and he always will.

And Taeyong has tears in his eyes. Because of how familiar it feels. How real. How easy it was to slip back into this small moment with Jaehyun again. How hard it was going to be to slip out.  
And perhaps it is the fragility of the moment that makes him cry.  
“Taeyong? Omg did I hurt you? Are you okay?” Jaehyun panicked, already moving way but Taeyong’s grip is surprisingly strong against his hip.  
“No. Don’t pull out. No don’t go. I just... I just.. this. You. You’re here.” He babbled, unable to form proper sentences. Jaehyun seemed to understand because his gaze softens and he nudged the side of his nose against Taeyong’s tear stained cheeks affectionately, warm breath calming

“Shhhh. Don’t cry. I’m here. I won’t leave.” He kissed Taeyong and he can taste his tears, can feel the tremble of lips, the hands running down his spine and he might cry too.  
“I’m sorry.” Taeyong hiccupped and Jaehyun finds is endearing and adorable.  
“No. It’s okay.” A smile tugged his lips and Taeyong cusps his cheek softly, stroking it before caressing his dimple. “Do you feel better now?”  
“Yes. Thank you.”  
“Now?” Jaehyun asked, eyes trailing down.  
“Now I just want you to fuck me.” He whispered.  
“Gladly.” Jaehyun grinned that shit eating grin and he’s back at it; giving Taeyong the dicking down of his life because he just wants the other to feel good, to feel taken care of, to feel loved.

“You’re so beautiful that it hurts.” Taeyong gasps, hands in his hair.  
“Do you miss this hyung? Did you miss me?” The other pants into his ear and it’s that has him undone, has him climaxing and shaking, spurting right there on his stomach.  
“Yes. Fuck I missed you.” He lies there for five minutes just coming down from his high before he realizes Jaehyun hasn’t orgasmed yet and then he’s already pushing the other down onto the sheets, feeling very exhausted but not ready to let sleep take over him.

“Let me ... let me ride you.” He stuttered, hands already propped against Jaehyun’s well-formed abs.  
“You don’t have to.” The other shakes his head but Taeyong rolled his eyes. Give it to Jaehyun to fuck the living daylights out of him but not let Taeyong do the same for him.  
“Nonsense.”  
“Taeyong-“  
“Shut up your stupid ass and let me get you off.” Taeyong doesn’t care that his bones feel like jelly, he's already sinking down onto Jaehyun without hesitation.  
"Fuck." Jaehyun threw his head back against the pillow, eyes closed, hands on Taeyong's sides, thumb stroking under his ribs. He can't get enough of that face, the expression that Jaehyun makes, he remembers it against the back of his eyelids, on nights when he's so wrung out and fatigued and his only ache was in his heart. And he can't seem to forget Jaehyun after all this time.

  
It's pleasure upon pleasure jolted up his spine. Taeyong is the devil incarnate with his undulating hips and dark, hazy eyes and Jaehyun pulls him down into a kiss. It's not soft. If anything it has too much tongue, too much bite and Taeyong moves away just so he can suck the skin of Jaehyun's jaw. The pacing is erratic and it sends the other keening, panting in his ear, and he comes, broken syllables of Taeyong's name falling from his lips. Taeyong rides him through his high as Jaehyun stared at him through the bliss, eyes blown, lips wet, the perfect picture he doesn't and never will deserve.

“Fuck that was good,” Jaehyun whispered into the night. The other collapses onto his side; sated, ready to call it night, but Jaehyun presses his nose into his sweaty shoulder.  
“I’m sure you missed this too.”  
“I missed you. All of you.” His arms naturally wrap around Taeyong's torso and kisses him on the crown of his head before falling off to sleep.

Taeyong wakes up sore and contented, rolling in the sheets before snuggling into a warm chest.  
“Morning.” Jaehyun rumbles, the vibrations reverting into his hair.  
“We can sleep a little longer.”  
“We have work.” He reminds Taeyong gently.  
"I know." They stare at each other for a moment and Jaehyun leans in to kiss the tip of his nose and he is reminded how he did so last night, how Taeyong had burst into tears.

"What's wrong? You're thinking... probably over thinking."  
“Do you regret this?” Jaehyun doesn't really comprehend what he's saying and then he understands and he stutters.  
“No. No Taeyong of course not. I mean ... how could I ever. Not-never with you.”

“Jaehyun what are we?”  
“What do you want us to be?”  
“You’re not answering my question.”  
“I’m asking you. What do you want us to be? I can’t promise to be the best lover or the best friend or the best partner but I’ll try.”  
“Jaehyun... do you realise how complicated this was- is?”  
"I always knew. I knew ever since I decided to ask you out. I knew I wouldn't always be there when you needed me or vice versa. But I want to try again. If you want." Taeyong purses his lips, looks up at the other, eyes scrunched in confusion. And it's just a look but it feels deeper than that. It feels like all the things they never said to each other, and Jaehyun doesn't care about anything else."Can I kiss you?"  
“Do you really have to ask?”  
“Yes... because I hurt you once before. I don’t know if you woul-would have me back. Would you?”  
“Yes. Yes I would. Because I never really let you go in the first place. I mean I tried but you were just ... so hard ... to let go of.”  
“I’m sorry.”  
“No.” Jaehyun shakes his head, pressing a trembling kiss against his cheekbone. “I’ve been contemplating it so much the past three years and I know. I’ve always known. When I hear other pilots talking about you and I feel a surge of jealousy and I would tell them that you would have no interest in narcissistic assholes but-but I had no right to do that. And I was so jealous. I hear what the flight attendants say, that you’re so handsome the passengers would sometimes trouble you just to see your face.”

“They do not do that.”  
“Yes they do. Because I would. I believe it. You don’t see how people stare at you at terminals and in flights and hotels. You’re oblivious to the fact that most of the pilots hit on you. And I get so absurdly jealous and that’s so stupid. I feel so stupid because how can I feel so jealous ... so jealous when you’re not mine...”  
“Then why? It’s been three years.”

“Exactly. It’s been three years and I still miss you and it’s stupid and I’m stupid and I can’t believe I hurt you like that. And I’m so sorry. I still think of it now and I feel even less worthy because how could I have ever hurt you when people ask me all the time how I even sleep at night when you slept next to me.”  
“Jaehyun...”

“Taeyong I’m a fool. It wasn’t because I thought you wouldn’t forgive me. I knew you would. I was hoping you would but it was the thought of forgiving myself. Of hurting you. Of trying to be a better person I wasn’t sure I could be. You deserve so much more than me.”  
“Please don’t say that.”  
“I was never sure but I always knew. Taeyong I love you.” He says it with such tenderness in his glassy eyes that Taeyong kisses him. And then he pinches him.  
"Owww! What was that for?" Jaehyun broke the kiss and whined.  
“You fool. How dare you make me wait so long? Such ridiculousness. Why do you think I never changed my phone number? I love you too you idiot. I always have. It never mattered to me if we were the perfect couple or the worst. I just wanted to be with you.”  
“I know. I’m sorry.”  
“Time really does pass by so fast.”  
“Yeah.”  
“I missed you.”  
“I missed you too.” Jaehyun kisses his neck, nips and bites and Taeyong feels a sense of dejavu wash over him- of those rare mornings like this when he was on the same continent as Jaehyun and they had a break from work.

“I miss that too.”  
"You do huh?" He smiles against his neck, hands moving upward, kissing more, nibbling more, tongue out laving on his skin.  
“Jaehyun I have work. ” Taeyong wiggles against him, pushing him away but not really pushing him away.  
“It’s too bad I can’t mark you somewhere visible. I wish I could. I would love to see everyone’s faces if they see you all marked up with my lovebites.”  
“Stop.”  
“You would like that too hyung wouldn’t you?”  
“Jaehyun.” He whines.  
“Hyung.”  
“You’re back to calling me hyung huh?”  
“Yes.” He smiles softly, caressing Taeyong’s cheek. “You smell like lavender.”  
“Why are you smiling like that fool?”  
“I don’t know if you remember, but you planted lavender outside my windowsill so I would wake up in the morning and open the window and the breeze would carry the scent in and it reminded me so much of you. I was conflicted at one point, I wanted to get rid of them. They reminded me too much of you. How you smelled when I would press a kiss to your neck.”  
To prove a point he nuzzled against his neck and kisses it softly, sighing at how familiar this was.  
“I didn’t though. You were so meticulous when we broke up. You returned my shirts and hoodies and you didn’t even leave a toothbrush in my toilet. And I understood. You were very considerate and I appreciate that. But I had nothing of you left Taeyong. And the lavender outside my windowsill was the only thing I had left. Call it masochistic. But I was also in love you.” He explained softly and Taeyong thinks he can burst into tears again but he doesn’t because it’s embarrassing how easily he cries.  
“What is it?”  
“Nothing it’s just... I love you too stupid.”  
Jaehyun smiles like the sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I'm back from the dead!
> 
> Firstly, I'm so sorry I haven't updated anything for awhile. I'm taking a really really hard Pre-U programme and I did shit for my first semester (like I failed kinda shit yall not like ewww I didn't get straight A's kinda fail). Anyway, it just really forced me out of the writing headspace and not gonna lie I'm so stressed and emo most of the time tryna get school to work out (in reality no one can afford to take creative writing as a major unless your parents are ballin). So I just really had to focus on getting my grades up.
> 
> Secondly, though I can't write as much I still read all of your comments and I'm always happy to read those. And I notice when yall recommend me on twitter and tumblr. Thank you for the support and love! Makes me feel so happy guys !  
> I can't promise that I'll update Perfect Places soon cause I'm about a month away from my semester 2 exams T-T.
> 
> As always thanks for the love and support.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry I haven't been writing Perfect Places. But damn I saw Jaehyun at SBS Gayo daejun looking like a pilot in that suit and I was triggered af and I really couldn't stop myself from indulging. Kudos and comments are much appreciated!


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